‘Hey Mama!
I hope you’re good. Live life and have fun. Yee, I’ve missed you, though I’ll be doing this every day until we come home…
Yess, Yess I’m reading… But Pesho ain’t coming back and I feel bad. But don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. I’ll do happy things to forget it… Take care of yourself, okay. I’m trying my best here as hard as I can. If I don’t pass in entry, I’m sorry I’m just sad, but I promise I’ll make for it end-term…
I love you so much, mum. I’ll do everything to make you happy.
Natalie.’
This is the first and last letter Natalie Nanga would write to her mother in a journal she had titled ‘Mum’s letters’. It was written on August 30, two days before the Moi Girls Nairobi School arson that killed Natalie and eight other girls.
The journal is one of the items Natalie’s mother, Clara Asiko, was given when she went to collect her daughter’s belongings from the school.
Natalie Nanga Asiko
When we visited Clara at her home in Syokimau, Machakos county, on Saturday, she was preparing for a church service on the estate. She was unusually calm and struck the figure of a woman who had not quite come to terms with the loss of her only child.
Clara was a single mother.
IT WAS JUST ME AND NATALIE
“It was just me and her. Natalie loved to write. This letter is so sad. Pesho was Natalie’s very good friend. They did everything together, but she transferred and it really affected Natalie,” Clara says as she looks at the journal pensively.
Pesho, a nickname for Patience, had bought Natalie the journal for her birthday, which was on August 12. Natalie was turning 15.
In her note, Patience said, “I was so excited about your birthday I bought this book in June. Nagubenda gama banda bassion [nakupenda kama Fanta passion — I love you like Fanta passion].”
Patience had been Natalie’s friend since their primary school days in Lukenya School. Clara says perhaps the culture shock of moving to a public boarding school from a private school was too much for Patience.
Natalie, too, had wanted to move to another school. “She said she didn’t like the school and didn’t give any specific reason, but I think it was the change to a public school. I thought she would get used to it with time, but she kept saying she didn’t like it, to the point I was considering moving her.”
Clara has not had much time to process Natalie’s death. The previous day, she was digging through her photo albums to look for good shots of Natalie to use for the service that will be held tomorrow before the burial on Friday.
Hawa Aziz was the first of the nine girls to be buried on Saturday at her parents’ home in Homa Bay county.
As Clara goes through Natalie’s photos, she says she finally found someone able to unlock the pattern on her daughter’s phone to retrieve more good pictures.
Clara Otieno
Clara Otieno, Natalie’s mother
Clara reminisces about the playful, life-loving girl Natalie was.
She says lovingly, “The problem with Natalie is that she always had funny photos. She was always posing or making hand gestures [like the peace sign] in her photos. Now I don’t know which one to use.”
Clara goes silent for a moment, then says, “This thing is hard. I cannot even describe it. I think I am still yet to process what has happened. It hasn’t sunk in yet. But we thank God.”
Clara’s strong faith is evident, and she says she raised her daughter to be a God-loving child as well.
Natalie’s friends are around and will be ushers for the Saturday service. They will sing the song titled ‘Oceans’ by Zoe Grace during the burial on Friday. Natalie loved it. Clara plays the song for us.
“My playlist is full of gospel music, which Natalie loved.”
One of Natalie’s favourite verses was, “When oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace.”
“Natalie was a good girl. She loved God. She was outgoing and had many friends. She was the kind of girl who would play ‘the last man standing’ where members of a WhatsApp group would compete to be the last person to write a message [even if it meant staying awake all night],” Clara says.
Clara’s joy of reminiscing about Natalie turns into anger when she recounts how she found out about her daughter’s death. “I don’t even want to go there. I think I am bitter about how the whole thing was handled,” she says.
LEARNED VIA WHATSAPP
Clara found out about the Moi Girls’ fire through the WhatsApp group for parents from Form 1R — Natalie’s class.
On the morning of September 2, at about 7am, Natalie was scrolling through her messages and saw one of the parents had written there was a fire at Moi Girls’ and he heard reports some girls had been injured. He told the parents to check on their girls.
