Kenyan musician and entrepreneur Esther Akoth Kokeyo, popularly known as Akothee, has stirred widespread debate on social media after sharing a candid message about co-parenting, child support, and what she described as the struggles many men face in toxic parenting arrangements.
In a lengthy Facebook post, the outspoken singer expressed concern over situations where children become caught in conflicts between separated parents, arguing that some fathers are subjected to emotional and financial pressure by irresponsible co-parents.
“Men are dying slowly,” Akothee wrote at the beginning of her message, before criticizing what she termed as the use of children as leverage in disputes between former partners.
“It breaks my heart seeing women trap men with children, then later turn the same children into a negotiation power play,” she stated.
The singer went on to challenge common perceptions surrounding co-parenting, insisting that the responsibility of raising a child should not rest on one parent alone. According to Akothee, true co-parenting requires both financial and emotional contributions from both parents.
“There is nothing like co-parenting with a broke, lazy, irresponsible baby mama. Co-parenting does not mean financial support from one side only. It means understanding, responsibility, and a 50/50 contribution towards the child’s well-being. As a mother, you should also contribute to the upbringing of your child,” she wrote.
Akothee also weighed in on the frequent use of courts to resolve child support disputes, arguing that legal action may not always favour the parent initiating the process.
“This court you keep talking about is not always the solution. You might even end up losing custody of the child if you do not meet the threshold of being a responsible parent,” she said.
The mother of several children further alleged that some fathers have become reluctant to send money directly to their children’s mothers due to fears that the funds could be misused.
“It is a pity that some baby daddies cannot even trust their baby mamas with money for basic needs. Some will use it on wigs and even eat the school fees,” she claimed.
In one of the most controversial sections of her post, Akothee accused some co-parents of manipulating children in an effort to emotionally hurt their fathers.
“Pinching babies to cry on camera for the father to see, hovering around every corner bad-mouthing the baby daddy, yet she cannot even put her own life together. Men have become helpless in the hands of toxic baby mamas,” she wrote.
The singer also addressed issues surrounding new relationships after separation, claiming that some women struggle to accept when former partners move on.
“Some women also do not want to see you move on with another woman. The moment you do, World War 3 starts all over again. Some have zero values or self-respect to the point of confronting your new partner just to create chaos,” she stated.